Jesus steps

For a lady, I have considerably big feet. Size 11.

These are actually size 12...

These are actually size 12…

When I get ski boots, I have the sides melted out to accomodate my wide bridge. If the high heels I’m eyeing don’t have a strap across the ankle, it’s guaranteed that the backs of my feet will slide right off. And when it comes to the shoes in the sale section, the options for my size are pretty … interesting. Who wants to buy terry cloth covered sandals and plastic yellow pumps?

It may seem that I’m knocking my long feet, but I assure you, the blessings overwhelm any complaints I have about them.

Playing soccer, I have that much more foot to power behind the ball as I wind up to take a shot. All the cute shoes women are tempted to buy, well, if they don’t carry my size, I’m not tempted one bit! And if I need to get somewhere in a hurry, you can bet my big feet are up to the challenge of making a world record speed walking trip.

In short, I love my big, long feet.

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I saw this big foot in Rome. Yes, it’s a bit bigger than mine.

Recently, I’ve been paying a lot more attention to them, or maybe they’re paying more attention to me.

In my recovery from ACL reconstruction surgery, walking has become something I will never again take for granted. After hobbling around with a full leg brace for two weeks, relearning how to walk while looking like a toddler in the process, my mind has been very attune to each step that I take.

Heel, big toe, second toe. Heel, big toe, second toe…’ is the mantra I’ve been repeating when I’m walking on the sidewalk downtown, ingraining the simple instructions into my mind so that I will be walking “normally,” soon.

And while I’ve been healing, improving each week -where small victories, like going up and down the stairs, reign supreme- there are days when I doubt, days when I wonder, ‘Am I really healing? Will I truly get better? When will this all be just a memory?’ Sometimes, I let these worries get ahead of me, and when I do, the pain and tweaks in my knee seem to magnify. One stab makes my heart jump. One pop makes my stomach flip.

I’ve given fear a huge power over me.

But I’m taking it back.

When I feel the stress start to make its entrance, just as my foot is slipping out of the car and onto the wet asphalt, I plant my foot firmly and bring my main man into the picture. That’s right, I begin taking what I like to call, “Jesus steps.”

Every step I take, whether I’m feeling fine or am in pain, I think “Jesus, Jesus, Jesus.” Each time my right foot hits the ground, I ask the Lord to give me strength, enough strength to take just one more step, to walk one more block, to make it through one more day. I hold onto these words because I know when I trust in Him, He will lead me exactly where I’m supposed to go.

In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

God has overcome the world and I’m doubting that He can overcome my knee pain? Overcome a simple step?

With my Jesus steps, as different as that may sound to some, my heart focuses on the One who gives strength and all those painful steps turn into moments where I’m powered by peace, for surly He will overcome.

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My feet enjoying a nice view of Santorini.

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